You have been called smart and inconsistent your whole life.

You can focus for nine hours on the thing that interests you and cannot start the twenty-minute task that has been on your list since Tuesday. You have systems. You have had many systems. They work beautifully for about three weeks.

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Adult ADHD is less a problem of attention than a problem of regulation, and most adults arrive at the diagnosis with years of missed deadlines, apologies, and quiet shame already behind them.

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What it actually looks like day to day:

You start five things and finish the one with the nearest deadline.

Your apartment is either immaculate or a disaster, with nothing in between.

You answer the easy messages instantly and let the important one sit for a week.

Time moves strangely, so you are either forty minutes early or twenty minutes late.

You take criticism harder than you let on.

You are tired from the constant work of managing yourself.

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What we actually do about it:

Kate Staikos, MHC-LP, leads this work at Kofman Wellness. If you take medication, that handles the neurology. Therapy handles everything built on top of it: systems that fit how you actually operate rather than how you were told you should, and the years of self-criticism that turned every unfinished task into evidence about your character. Kate is in network with Aetna and Cigna, and every session is by secure video anywhere in New York.